"When there's a wound, use medicine to heal it. If it does not heal in a day, make it two. It is still hurts after so, let's give it a longer try, to a week or maybe even two. Surely as you are faithful in taking in the medicine to heal the wound, time and the effects of the medicine will proof that you will recover."
This is what my DOCTOR BOSS told me after I went back to work today, after a relapse of pain inside of me the whole of yesterday. When he spoke that, my heart was triggered for a moment. It does not just apply in physically sickness, it applies in emotional and spiritual sicknesses too. I thought time will not heal the pain, and I grow up believing that, but yet to that certain extend, time does heal the broken-hearted. I believe God was the only healer of my life, but above and beyond that, God gave me time to be that ultimate healer too. I thought a week would heal that huge wound, but it didn't. Well, I gave it 10 days, still it lingers - almost made an U-turn and headed back. (thank God I was firm). Then it came two weeks, when I felt the pain was a little lighten. Soon it was 20 days and now after 25 days and counting, I am further and further away from what was lost and what was called pain. =] *praise God*
I could not have overcome without my determination and firm believe in God. Not only did I believe that with Him, I am the majority, not only did I agree that greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world, surely not only remembering that I am more than a conqueror in Christ, I did what I should. I work towards the goal with those belief. I did not only rely on a God who is there, I work together with Him and that's why I am where I am today. I know my past has no more say in me, and I have moved on.
Time has proven that it will heal, God has showed that He is still as faithful. Nothing is impossible if only you believe that your God is greater than your problems. Stop whinning over the pain, focus on the Love that will overflow in you. To some people out there, stop thinking that your problem is so big and others are just minor. I won't say I have a HUGE problem, but it was huge enough for me to deal with, however I chose to look far beyond that HUGE PROBLEM, I saw the LOVE that surronds and surpasses my problems. I held on and every moment, until I see God move in my heart, in my life. If my God can do it for me, He can do it for you too. Remember NOTHING, and again I say, NOTHING is impossible for Him to do, if only you are willing to seek Him.
Praise God for leading me through, even to the extend that I know I made no regret in the path I have chosen. The time has passed me by, the journey has ended. I wait no more but to just move on for a better future tomorrow. =]
A life I lay at the altar once again. I am ready to be used, I am ready to be that vessels to preach the gospel. Jesus I am ready, to the river I am going, bringing sins I cannot bear, I will walk as You say. I am so sure I am building up N318 together and I am so going to love my little ones. I am ready. =]
*I am not interested in hearing anything about my EX, my past. So friends, help me and help yourself, you don't have to judge over what had happened nor do you have to comment anything much, he is still as great as I first knew him and forever he will be. This is my belief so please respect me.* Thank you
Love, daphne_chloe
9:01:00 PM
Monday, December 29, 2008
I know many people read my blog thus I want to make it a declaration that this is the way I have picked and this is the way of which I know I am happy with. For people who have had heard me complaint, whined, or even judged, please forgive me, because those were spoken out of anger and disappointment. I know now that I have no authority or even rights to do so, thus I seek for all your forgiveness.
As I end 2008 having the biggest obstacles yet in my life to overcome, it is not easy at all. Rather, it almost killed me along my passing days, but thank God for His grace and mercy, strength and love that carried me through my teary and painful nights. *Thank God* Now, I know I am more than a conqueror, I know I am more than just a victor, I know I am able with Christ always.
I speak so much, but how do I know I have overcome? I know and believe I have overcome because I no longer yearn to "see" in anyway, I no longer think, I no longer have the thoughts as first, I know I no longer feel sad when I think, I know my love is different as of now, and above all, I know when I faced the reality, I smile over it and give myself a pat of my shoulder. =] I have really clear the day, I know I have come out smiling over the storms of my life knowing the best has yet to come! Praise God for such a promise to me!
The closure of 2008 was indeed a bang. I ended well believing greater is He who is in me than he who is in the world. There is nothing impossible for a God who I truly love! NOTHINGISIMPOSSIBLE.
Thank God for friends who helped me out. Thank God for leaders who always believe in me. Thank God for being God in my life.
2009 will be "Challenging, Daring, Exciting and Fun" - revelation (14/12/08)
Shinning His Light Daphne_Chloe
12:11:00 PM
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
A different Christmas, A Different meaning of Christmas
It was supposed to be a half day work then followed by church and some programs where will allow me to welcome Christmas at that very first second, but this year is just so different. It is unique, it is special. I woke up earlier than normal working days because my boss is inviting and treating us a good solid DIM SUM meal (ok, I am being bias, cause I love dim sum) for breakfast as a Christmas gift and blessing to us.
The place where we had for dim sum, is special. It is a place that's open by men whose life are testimonies of God's goodness and grace. Well, my boss didn't chose that place out of sympathy towards them, but because the food is really good. [read this website and find out more breakthrough] Anyway, we were there and while having the good food served, with great attitudes and excellent services, I am already overwhelmed, but what brought tears to my eyes were an amazing, life transforming testimony of this man calls Kelvin Soh.
Upon listening, I finally understood the real meaning of Christmas and Easter. It may just be another public holiday to many, or some "fun" day to some, but today, I found out the meaning of why God did what no man can nor can anyone understand. Indeed the reason is YOU and I. What's impossible to man, is indeed only possible with God. I can't explain the joy of realizing a little bit more about Christmas today. I know why I was set in this situation, I was make to understand from a totally different angle now.
I just cant explain any further, the love I have for God is really amazing and unbreakable anymore. I am so going to soar high and run well in 2009 and all the days of my life. God showed me 2 verses that pierced through my heart. "But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:31
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34
These 2 verses ring my heart and my soul, surely my call for 2009. God I love You.
Blessed Merry Christmas and May you find the reason why you are celebrating Christmas this year too. =]
Jesus love me
I can't explain any further the love of God where He has for me, and my love for Him from today till I don't know how. Daphne_Chloe
8:45:00 PM
Monday, December 22, 2008
The end is just yet the beginning
The end of me means the living of Christ The end of 2008 means is the start of 2009 The end of life means the start of eternal living The end of pregnancy is the start of parenthood The end of a relationship means WHAT?
People think my feelings changes as the environment around me change People predicted that I am just as fine as they think I would People assumed things were as easy if not easier than they can assume
But PEOPLE OUT THERE. I dare to swear (knowing I can't) my feelings have NEVER changed since DAY 1. You all have think that I have changed but is because I have my pride too. I want my face, I tell you people I have moved on and I am. Yet sadly to say, moving on is NEVER as easy as anyone can expect it to me. Don't tell me what 1 months or 3 months, is not the duration. Don't tell me I am walking in circle, well at least I am honest. I know I am but in a huge way, but slowly and assuredly I am moving on well and one day I will be free. But until that day, people let me fall as many times as I can.
I don't know what I want to say anymore, I just know is not easy and it is not getting any easier. I know what I want, but is just plain stupid in the eyes of others. I know and I know if I were to walk back that way, I won't listen to what you people will comment or how I will be judge, because I know my life, and I know how I want it to be.
*this entry has no one to direct too, but I am just too tired of people asking me anything everything with regards to this*
If I just don't want to talk, just maybe leave me alone bah. Thanks.
"my love for you goes on and on"
Shinning His Light Daphne_Chloe
9:31:00 PM
Friday, December 19, 2008
Verse 1: Only you can fill the emptiness inside of me Take my hand and lift up high and guide me Jesus You’re my healer You will always be my friend And I will walk this journey with you
Verse 2: When I’m the darkness you shed light for me Open up my eyes so I can follow thee Jesus my provider You’re always there for me And I will lift my heart towards to thee
Chorus: Jesus, I’ll follow you Jesus, I’ll follow you For me you gave your life My life my sacrifice No matter what may be, I’ll follow you Jesus, I’ll follow you Jesus, I’ll follow you The plans you have for me Your gift of life I’m free The trust I have in you, I’ll follow you
Bridge: At times, I really feel so low At times, I really wanna tear But Jesus, You heard my prayer The pains, the scars, the hurts You took it away
*amazing God* You are the reason, that He gave His life You are the reason that He suffered and die You are the reason for this season Merry Christmas.
10:55:00 PM
Sunday, December 14, 2008
I am blessed
Happy 8th Anniversary to me and my God. It was really pure joy to have known the Lord. It was a great start of the morning where I thank God for this day. It was a peaceful journey where I plucked on to my MP3 and hear the songs that speaks to my heart; "The God I know, Captivated, Come to the Father." God is just too real when He wants to reveal who He is. After which, was supposed to be bible studies for my sheep, but we end up queuing up at staircase 5 at 1145am! KASU? Nope we are not, we are just hungry enough to want to take the front seats and enjoy the presence of God.
Everything was indeed awesome to me. I enjoyed the praise so much today, even with limping feet, I still wanna jump for God, cause I know my life no longer I. Worship was amazing. The song, "I stand in awe" Goodness, I really stood in awe to see the glorified life that God has given me and will continue to give. I saw the flash bright light ahead of me and I saw myself as a SHEEP in the green pasture of the Lord. Peace will overflow me. The WORD of God from Pastor Tan was great; simply awesome. It is the word of the season especially for me as I re-dedicate a new year back to the Lord. Thank you God. Thank you so much.
Had CG fellowship and after which we went down to Marina Square. It was great time spent together even when I was a little tired, and not forgetting it was a place with memories. I kept telling myself, where I fall down, where I will get up. Today is a brand new day, a brand new start of a new year, surely I can do more today, this year than I can last year.
Argh, it seems I am spouting nonsense, but the joy and happiness within me is overflowing. I can't take it, I need to pass it on. :) The joy of the Lord is my STRENGTH always. AMEN.
14 December 2008 Revelation : Challenging, Daring, Engaging, Fun [C-D-E-F'09]
Love, daphne_Chloe
*I will get to know him but please don't match make hor!* :P
11:28:00 PM
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Happy 8th Anniversary with Dear God
Looking back at the past 8 years of my time and life with God. I am truly amazed by the works that the Lord has done and is still continuing to do. I remembered I accept Jesus as my Savior and Lord in a Healing Rally in Singapore Stadium. It was a pouring bad night. I went down to the altar call not even knowing what I was doing until I came to my "senses" when I was in the Kallang MRT station. The first thought as a 12 years old girl was, how daddy will react to it, knowing my whole entire family is a buddhist or it is taoist.
For the first two months I managed to go to church regularly without daddy suspecting me doing that, until one fine Sunday where he woke up earlier than me and I was questioned. OH NO! My christian life and faith was challenged and that's where my journey of faith in Christ begins. I was banned to go to church for about 6 months after my dad found out. As a young girl who is pretty quiet, I have no idea what to do then to use my just known "mustard seed" and pray. I was challeng and I did give up along that 6 months that God doesn't exist, cause He didn't help me. It was about August after that 6 months, where one of the nights, after completing my homework, I took the courage to talk to mum about going to church and how happy I was with those new-found friends. She seems open to it and after that, knowing that daddy is in his good mood, I then take that full "power" and courage to ask daddy for permission to go to church. "OK" was his reply.
I was overwhelmed but yet I fear cause I don't know what more to expect when I am going back to church. Second week of August till second week of September were just that one month for me to find what's this God that Christian are worshiping. I found Him and with my little knowledge, accept and invite Him once again. That weekend of September, the week where it was my birthday, my church has this seminar and I went with just the heart to learn but little did I expect, a prophesy from this prophet came into my life and my life is fully transformed and changed my God.
The prophecy was/is and will always be :
"You will go to a land where there's full of youth and from there you will lead them in the ways of Christ"
I will remember this all the days of my life because this picture get clearer and clearer as time passes by. I was in that church for about another year or so, where I learnt to read the Word of God, speak better English and gain more confident in who I am in Christ. I get to play the drums and share the opinions of mine, help out in the AV crew and also to lead and play with the children. I have fond memories of where I grew up from and surely the people who were there for me since the start of my faith. Well, God took me out of my comfort zone to a place of influence.
He planted me into my second church which is someone afflicted to my secondary school. Then and there was also the times, where my best friends and I saw the hands of God moved and placed us together and serve Him alone. I went to the church without knowing why I went, just a plain step of faith, because I was not in any organisation like my friends were. I struggle a little at first but I fought on and I blended into the crowd and the church very fast. I grew up the most in this place, because it was small, I was given a lot of opportunity to do a lot of things and try out. God was/is and will always be with me, that period of time were also the toughest time,as I was a school "top" prefect, class chair person, representing school for sports and not forgetting to do well; extremely well for my studies and not to forget my committment to church. All these will never be possible if I were to do it on my own. IT WILL NEVER ACCOMPLISH.
I grew up to know what I am, who I am. I get to serve and really enjoy serving, from the sound system person, carrying equipments, to doing presentation during praise and worship, to serving in Children Church, helping out in Youth Ministry and also in Cell Group. Goodness, those were those crazy times where I give my time all for, and I see myself smiling and say is all worth it. Many miracles happened in my life along the journey where I walked with God, there were many times where I have to really trust and rely on God to the maximum I DON'T KNOW how, but a plain faith to just believe and obey. God will never leave me nor forsake me is what I read and always believe about this God whom I worship.
Well, the verse that keeps me going and going and going even till today is "BE STRONG and COURAGEOUS, FOR I AM WITH YOU". 7th years have passed, has God failed me. NEVER. Has God let me down. NEVER. Has God gave up on me and change His plan in using me. NEVER. I failed God, because I wasn't as faithful as He is. I let God down because I am only human and I do sin against Him. God has always trusted and believe in me doing great and mighty things for Him, but many a time, I failed him because of my own self-esteem and confident. Anyway, cutting the whole long story short, God is indeed faithful.
As I did what I could as God has called me to be, it was time for me to rise up for a greater and higher call. Once again, He took me out of my comfort zone to where He wants me to be. I came to my current church, with even more fear and doubts, but with greater confident too, for I believe if my God can do it for me once, He can do it for me twice, He can do it for me the THIRD time. True enough, my transition period into the church was really great. I met good people who helped and guided me. I am just so thankful.
Zooming into this year, many things happened that I was tested to prove my love and stand in God and for God. I was really thrilled and super worried as they came, cause I NEVER believe I can even overcome. It came, and not over did I overcome, I walked and passed the test VICTORIOUSLY. *get hold of me to tell you my life story of 2008* I am truly blessed by God in 2008. There are so many good and happening things that happened and caught me just right there to know if it is not God, it won't happen. It has to be God.
As I enter into the new year with the Lord, I am so excited, because it is a new year of breakthroughs and more breakthroughs. I took a night out before my 8th anniversary to think and pray about what it will be like in this year to come. I heard God spoke to me " Fun, Challenging, Daring and Engaging" I believe my new year will be fun, will certainly be more challenging as I am moving on from glory to glory with Him and a full life to dare to try and to dare to believe with God all things are possible and an engaging prospect to touch the community and the world.
Praise the Lord. I mean with such a vision, this is what I need for the next year(phrase) of my life. I will continue to pray about it and hear more from God about this vision that He has given me. I am just so thankful. 2009 will indeed be the best year to come.
A vision for 2009
Fun, Challenging, Daring and Engaging
A song to encourage me to lead me on in 2009.
Pre-Chorus :
Unafraid what’s ahead
You are always there before
My whole world your desire
You are always there
Just right behind
Chorus :
My life is your song
To you my heart belongs
Let all earthly crowns
Fade in the shadow of your cross
My life is your song
I’ll sing for you alone
Nothing in this world
Can take me away from you
Our love goes on and on
Bridge
In all my life be glorified
With Christ in me
No longer I
So take my all
Consuming fire
Your light in me I’ll make it shine
I am just so WOW. I am a happy child now, so many things are happening in my life and I mean I don't lead a dull boring life. It is so challenging and I am so going to believe I am ending 2008 well and welcoming 2009 greater.
Happy 8th Anniversary with my DEAR of my DEAR
I love You Jesus.
I love You Jesus
I GROW UP K-N-O-W-I-N-G You
I love You Jesus
I GROW UP S-E-R-V-I-N-G You
I love You Jesus
My life is saved by You
I'll NEVER forget
NEVER forget
GROW UP L-O-V-I-N-G You
This is just a chorus of a song that speaks so much. I mean even if I am 50 years old celebarting my XX anniversary with the Lord, I will still sing this song, because I know every year, I grow up to know more about Him, every year, I grow up to serve, and every year, it came so real that my life is saved by Christ that my life is no longer mine and surely, every year will be a year, I grow up to LOVE Him MORE.
*I can go on and on talking about God - will stop here for a while*
Love,
Daphne_Chloe
14 Decemeber 2000 - 14 December 2008
[with many 14 December to come]
*I will fight to overcome this area of my life.*
10:08:00 PM
Saturday, December 06, 2008
Setting my priorities right all over again
When I started blogging, this blog is just for my own personal updates and as I grow on growing up, God enters and soon after, this blog was updated with His words and wisdom of knowledge in poetry form. I really enjoyed those time where I was fully used by God to write and bless people around. I remembered those times when my blog was an entry point for many to come and ponder about the situations they are facing and the God that they know. Not all, but many of my entries challenge people to trust a God who is invisible, yet faithful.
Along the way, many distractions came. My blog has became self-centered, and about just about myself. I felt enough of being toss back and forth, I am making a stand today. This blog is going to be re-directed back to Christ once again.
People who know what have had happened, I am just going to say, I made the choice myself, I will be able to overcome it. You people out there can keep your comments to yourself and just be quiet, because it got nothing to do with you at all. I know my life better than you, thus if you want to judge, remember to judge yourself first.
Love, daphne_chloe
7:04:00 PM
Thursday, December 04, 2008
What a DAY
I woke up pretty early this morning, I have no idea why too. Just not very comfortable in my tummy, and with that I decided to pray too, it was about 5am then. I pray for about 20minutes before I went into my lalaland again and up again at 6.30am. Was in the bathroom for long and when it was time, I went to work. I dislike those days when I have strong discomfort in my stomach, but that won't give me any reason or excuse not to work. As I was praying this morning, I felt a strong urge of staying at home, I don't know why. Well, I thought it was the voice of my laziness, thus, I woke up and pushed away the thoughts. I went to work.
As I was walking towards to the MRT station from home, the same route which I took everyday, I have had a fell. It was so unglam. SO PAI SAE. Thank God no one was there except an uncle and he saw me fell down and walk away. *so helpful singaporean* Of course, I have learnt, that when I fall down, I must know how to stand up and walk again. *philisophy* I started walking but there was a strong discomfort on my joint of my right ankle. I pushed on, and I walked through AMK hub, and to realised, I am perspiring cold sweat due to the pain, and from there, decided to U-turn and go back home.
Went to see a sen sae, which is a total waste of money. He just help me put some oil and wrap it up, without even rubbing the wound!! ARGH.. Anyway, this is how my little "Pig" leg looks like now.
Everything seems so wrong from the start, but nevertheless, I still believe this is a good day that the Lord has had given to me. Anyway, I am still lost in my own world, not because I think too much, but NEVERMIND. I will share when I think I can.
Signing off, daphne_chloe
11:15:00 AM
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
If only :
1. Life is smooth and peaceful 2. Love is easy and romantic 3. Joy is smile and laughter
Then : 1. I will never be more than a conqueror 2. I will never learn to appreciate 3. I will never experience the price of tears
I really thank God and people around me for I live in a world of reality and not fantasy. I am on the court of learning every now and then, and I am glad for that teachable spirit that God has given me. I know life is full of ups and downs, surely and importantly, I shouldn't be dwelling on the negative always. Down moments are just growing up time and great experience with the Lord, not forgetting it will always be those stepping stones which were once stumbling blocks that bring me up to yet another level. I am entering into a reality of what it takes to love and to be loved. Being a young woman of my own thoughts, it was really tough for me to fight on, but thank God for an angel "joseph" who were/are/will always be there for me to teach me. Well, not the most patient dude around, but surely, with his strength, he is giving me the best he can. I am just so thankful for a young man like him. The ultimate meaning of JOY. -Jesus, Others and You- It is more than just smile and laughs, but the deep feelings that flow from within. *Thank God for the strength to pass on the joy that's within me.*
Today is another bad day to begin with, sorry sweetheart, but he makes today a special day. =] I was in the worst of my moment, where I think I am just nothing, I am not even worthy. *I am just normal, I have my down moments too, so readers, don't always think I am that *high*.* I felt like giving up everything, and let go of everything in my hands. [so dumb of me, cause I have had based it with my emotions] I am just too "tired". Even after being assured, it didn't get me anywhere better, rather, it has pissed off my dearest one. I am just LOST. argh...
But my dear never fail to be just there once again. He surprised me today in my lowest moment, with flowers. Is SUNFLOWER and a BEAR. *Sunshine bear* I got shocked when I came back from toilet and that's it, on my table and with a card that writes "hugs from me to you". I was overwhelmed.
Just the flowers
I don't know what more to say than to be just thankful to God and for him who makes everything possible for me. It makes me smile all the days of my life when he is so proud of me being his girlfriend and that the ultimate journey we are heading on is marriage and eternity.
These 2 are what will be with me till forever. I love them, is call Pooh and the Sunshine Bear. *when I took this picture, it just reminds me of us, he is the pooh and I am the sunshine bear. the bear will always lean and trust on pooh, while pooh will be supporting all the way*
These are the love of my life, I will never sleep without them *at home*.
Thank you so much my love, you have made my day like mourning into dancing, my sorrow into joy. Thank you for just being able to stand by me when I needed someone most. Thank you dear.
The love that pumps always.
*you know why sunshine bear?* dear replies: "It is because you are my sunshine, you are always smiling at me."
This statement makes me wanna share all my life with, not only sunshine, but through storms and rain, shine or darkness. =]
