I have had enough, I have had to go through. I never complaint; neither will I [only the closest circle of friends heard me well] It hurts when I have no place to run, it hurts when reality hits, it hurts whenever I think of it; IT HURTS. The reality gives me no face to run, rather it leads me to the dead ends of my life with tears. I never understand neither will I, but I thank God, I don't. Ignorance is blissful?; sometimes it is. :)
I grew up instantly; I learnt important lessons overnight. I really don't know what more to say, than to thank God for allowing me to walk out victoriously! I admit I cried over the lost, I admit I cried over my stubbornness, I admit I cry. Yet I wanna say, that through those tears, I saw the hands of God, I saw the power of believing in Him, I saw the faithfulness of Him, I also realised, the flip side of everything that changes my mind. :)
I have had moved on; moving on very well too. No more turning back!
This is one song that speaks. A song from God to me! -Thank You Lord-
Oh, why you look so sad? Tears are in your eyes Come on and come to me now Don't be ashamed to cry Let me see you through 'cause I've seen the dark side too When the night falls on you You don't know what to do Nothing you confess Could make me love you less I'll stand by you I'll stand by you Won't let nobody hurt you I'll stand by you
So if you're mad, get mad Don't hold it all inside Come on and talk to me now Hey, what you got to hide? I get angry too Well I'm a lot like you When you're standing at the crossroads And don't know which path to choose Let me come along 'cause even if you're wrong
I'll stand by you I'll stand by you Won't let nobody hurt you I'll stand by you Take me in, into your darkest hour And I'll never desert you I'll stand by you
And when... When the night falls on you, baby You're feeling all alone You won't be on your own
I'll stand by you I'll stand by you Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you Take me in, into your darkest hour And I'll never desert you I'll stand by you I'll stand by you Won't let nobody hurt you I'll stand by you Won't let nobody hurt you I'll stand by you
I am happy I made the decision.
Love, Daphne
8:27:00 PM
Monday, October 27, 2008
Public Holiday!
I sent out to Sentosa early in the morning for some activity that was organized within the zone. It was actually to get to know more people around; within the zone and to see if sparks will be possibly be created. To me, I went with a heart of knowing friends and a time to relax before I start a new start of my life, tomorrow; Working Life. I played all the games and enjoy the time with the rest of the people, getting to know others as well; enlarge my social circle within the church. Anyway, it was fun time bah.
On my way home, I was asked about that sensitive question again! It just kept me thinking about what I really want in life. I mean not just about wishing, hoping, praying, but WANTING. While I was bathing just now, I felt the Lord spoke to me, "My dear, did you realized you have never yearn for something so badly in My Name before?" I stood in my bathroom and think, yes, I have NEVER asked for something so badly in God's name ever before, not even when my uncle had to pass away before my eyes, not even when my life was in the worst stage. Until now, I "begged" God, I prayed, I visualized, I asked God for something; something precious in my life. He asked me then, "Will I not give it to you then?" I was stunned.
What seems impossible to me, just means it takes a little longer time with God and me to work well. :) I thought that whatever I do, I can save something but I know I can't, I tried to give up everything I have and anything I need to have that, but it just seems no. =] Anyway, the 7 days of morning prayer, you will see me there in church to pray and to pray and to pray. 2 Chronicles 7:14 " if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." [Land = Daphne's heart - hahaha]
I Love You Sweet Jesus I Love You My Lord I desire more of You Closer in my life, I surrender my heart to You I Love You Sweet Jesus I Love You My Lord Ill give up all I have In exchange for all of You I belong to no one else but You
I close my eyes Lift up hands to worship You You're the love of my life No one else matters In this world but You No one can take Your place In my heart
God love me, Daphne
7:21:00 PM
Sunday, October 26, 2008
I Love God Wholeheartedly
While I was serving in Children Church yesterday, my heart was really burdened, because this Saturday was so different compared to the last few. I was crying within me but I know despite what I have to smile and give my best when I am serving. I tear a few times, my eyes were red, there were tears in my eyes, but within me, I was praying for the strength to really move on. What surprises me was, even my children were crying and for no reasons, they were crying, they entered the hall, yelling and screaming. My spirit spoke inside of me, God know exactly the kind of pain and heartaches you are going through. Immediately, I got the strength to serve and play with the children. Having them to sit on my lap, hug and kiss me, I think they made my day.
I had a chance to speak to mummy. I'm just overwhelmed by the words of encouragements she gave me. I mean I thank God for sending me great mummy in my life. [Another "mummy" is my spiritual mentor]
Today, I attended Service 3. I brought home a lot of things that was shared by Pastor Kong. I mean I really caught a lot, not being taught, but I really caught the spirit with it. One thing that Pastor Kong shared was how to still praise and worship God in times where I need to grinned my teeth, hold my fist, and bite the bullet of pain and still say, Lord I trust in You, I LOVE YOU. It is tough, really no joke about it, but again, I know, the peace that flows with the spirit of surrendering and trusting.
So much more to say about the God I love, but I just want to share this song that has made my heart cry so loud.
His love will never fail me My God reigns – He’s ruling over all In all my Life In every situation I know My God is greater My God is over all
(Verse 1) I have a hope so sure An anchor for my soul My peace in the worst of times I trust in God alone
(Pre Chorus) Let every voice declare it now
(Verse 2) By faith I have believed And on this truth I stand No power in life or death Can take me from His hand
Above all sickness, above all fear Above every heartache here In earth and heav’n – My God reigns! Above all power, above all thrones The greatest love I’ve ever known Today, forever, my God reigns!
Agape, daphne
11:51:00 PM
Saturday, October 25, 2008
A song that touches my soul in the Morning
I'm Yours - Planet Shaker
Oh Lord When I think of all You've done My heart sings of Your love That saved my soul And made me whole My life is Yours
Cause You paid the price I give You my life, I'm Yours
So no matter what the cost I will go for You No matter what it takes, I'm Yours Because You paid the price at Calvary I give You my whole life, I'm Yours
Oh Lord My everything to You I lift My heart and soul I live For You alone I'm not my own My life is Yours
I'm Yours Jesus I am Yours
10:10:00 AM
Love, Encourager of my life. (Part 1)
Daryl Lee Yong Ming Daryl Lee - the TIKO! heee.. Despite all, Daryl has been the best friend one can ever find. He will be there when you need a pair listening ears, he will be there when you need someone to cheer you on, he will be there to spice you up with his nonsenses too. He has been a wonderful friend since we were young and innocent, a young man now full of potential. Daryl, you will be my friend always. Love you and stay strong dear.
Alex Koh Chung Kiat Alex Koh (CK) - the pal. He has been someone awesome and someone whom you sure to rely on in trouble times. His words of encouragements that brings with convictions are what drives people near him. A dare to try young man with great potential to be untapped. CK, has been a good buddy whom I could pour my life out with, a pillar of support through it all. A friend whom I will keep all the days of my life. Love you too.
Michelle Tong Shimin and Rachel Tan Si Yi The Love of my life. Thank you for being there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on, a teddy to laugh with and a dear to enjoy life for. You two are the best in my life, you two are the ones I thank God for everyday. Michelle - An duper independent young woman with her own mindset and perspective of life. Yet someone who is there to sympathize with you the problem you faced and encountered. She is the trust you can and ever need to have. Rachel - My lovely one. A young woman who is CRAZY, with everything she prosesses. While above all, she is the best friend. There to smile with you, cry for you and tease you to carry on. I love the both of you NOW and ALWAYS.
Love, daphne
PS : To be continued.
9:40:00 AM
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
400th Post
This post shall be specially dedicated to God. A God who is real and faithful all the days of my life.
21 things I remembered from January 2008 - October 2008 1. I remembered how I took the step out to cross over in February. 2. I remembered how I worshiped God when I was lost. 3. I remembered how I prayed when I can't think for tomorrow. 4. I remembered how I entered bible school with only FAITH. 5. I remembered how I availed myself to God when I have none. 6. I remembered how I trusted God when I lost a love one. 7. I remembered how I smiled to God when I needed to cry. 8. I remembered how I stood for God after being persecuted as a Christian. 9. I remembered how I followed God when I'm required to lead. 10. I remembered how I praised God when my parents witnessed my graduation. 11. I remembered how I thanked God for the blessings He gave me on my 21st. 12. I remembered how I gave to God when I have none. 13. I remembered how I loved God when I start to love someone. 14. I remembered how I believed in God to step out of my comfort zone. 15. I remembered how I promised God when none promises in my life came to pass. 16. I remembered how I grabbed unto God when my life was in a mess. 17. I remembered how I yearned for Joy in teary days. 18. I remembered how I cried to God. 19. I remembered how I leaned on God with nothing in my hands. 20. I remembered how I was appreciated through my weaknesses. 21. I remembered how I was encouraged by Gentle Holy Spirit.
21 things God told me. 1. I am crossing over with you, you are not alone, My dear. 2. I am the Truth, the Life and the Way, My disciple. 3. I hear your everything, My love. 4. I am not just a God who give vision, but also provision, My beloved. 5. I am a miracle-maker, My precious. 6. I am a Giver; Giver of Life, My child . 7. I am your pillar of strength, My lovely one. 8. I will stand by you to bear the strips, My princess. 9. I am the Head and not the tail, trust in Me. 10. I will bring your love one to Myself, I love them as much as you do. 11. I will open up the floodgates of Heaven for you, My faithful servant. 12. I look into your heart when nobody does, My darling. 13. I will demonstrate the way of living, My baby. 14. I have a plan perfectly done for you, My favorite. 15. I am someone who never lie, especially to you, the apple of My eyes. 16. I am your God no matter what happened, I love you. 17. I remembered the day I promised you of joy with your salvation, My daughter. 18. I saw all your tears and it hurts me to see you in that, My girl. 19. I am the pillar of strength of you, My sweetheart. 20. I love you for who you are, My honey. 21. I am your friend and teacher always, My lovely woman.
I remembered all.
My life is never dull and scary, for I know I have a God who is there for me, anytime, anywhere of my life. Thank you God for loving me.
*I cried when I recalled how good God is to me*
Love, d.
9:20:00 PM
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Happy 1st Month
This is for you DEAR, ALEX KOH CHUNG KIAT.
Thank you for loving me when I don't know how. Thank you for guiding me when I was lost. Thank you for giving yourself to me. Thank you for just being you in my life. Thank you for everything. I love you.
Love, Daphne 2359 191008
11:38:00 PM
Friday, October 17, 2008
Would you be there?
If I were blue, would you be there for me, And whisper in my ears that's ok. Would you stand by me, let me hold you tight, And say you love me one more time.
If I feel good, would you slow dance with me, And touch my lips with tender loving care, Would you die for me, would you run with me, And never look back..
Would you be there to love, to be with me? Would you swear that your love is always true? Would you say that you'll always be the one, to take my breath away?
Would you be there to love, to be with me? Would you swear that your love is always true? Would you say that you'll always be the one, to take my breath away?
Would you be there..
If I will wait, would you still think of me, And wished that you could hold me now. Would you die for me, would you run with me, All the way ...
Would you be there to love, to be with me? Would you swear that your love is always true? Would you say that you'll always be the one, to take my breath away?
Would you be there to save my soul tonight, Would you swear that your love is always true, Would you say that you always be there, To kiss my pain away.
Would you be there ..... for me ...
smile & move on Daphne
8:31:00 PM
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
I am blessed
Many who knows me know that I don't really eat a lot, but after getting myself merge with someone.. I think I'm growing horizontally! He better don't mind if I grew to be a FAT PIG.
We went Fish & Co. We went to some Hong Kong cafe We went to TCC We went to Ding Tai Feng for dim sum. * I complaint because their siew mai is not yellow in color* We went to Dian Xiao Er
and many others that I can't remember..
I am seriously thinking that I am growing fat...nevertheless, the above resturants are selling good food. Well, if you pocket is full, you can give these places a try.
*save money*
Love, ALdaphnEX
2:35:00 PM
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.
True love is a sacred flame That burns eternally And none can dim its special glow Or change its destiny True love speaks in tender tones And hears with gentle ear True love gives with open heart And true love conquers fear True love makes no harsh demands It neither rules nor binds And true love holds with gentle hands The hearts that it entwines.
I'm so sad and depressed Is all I want to do is rest I go to sleep at night But my dreams I just can't fight
I think of you lying in that bed And wonder if there is anything I could have said I wish you were still here But I know that you are still near
I love you more than you know I just wish you didn't have to go I just want one more day with you And I know thats what you would have wanted too
I miss you more and more each day There is so much more we had to say I know I will see you again But my life is just started to begin.
Thanks for entering into my life. I love you always. *I look ugly* -taken by Reyes' N73-
