Friday, February 08, 2008
For 7 days, I have been enduring, finally the tears of unjust fall from my eyes. It just did unknowingly as I was viewing your lovely entry on your blog with my handphone. It was really a sight that I can't believe with my own eyes, for the very first thing I did early in the morning was to see if you were online, and wonder if you did update your blog, that's what I received. YES, is early in the morning.
I recalled you mentioning, you aren't willing to commit, but now you did. You told you wasn't sure I guess you are pretty now. You were challenged to go that extra mile for God before things should happened, yet you trapped yourself into your own emotions. Finally, I understand, all these while when you shared with me are mere words, excuses that you tell me, I WON'T LIKE YOU, WE ARE IMPOSSIBLE. Wow, after more than a month, I finally understood. I guess it was a little late, but is better than I never knew.
I like you but I cannot be with you! - from him-
I thank God for my covenant once again, because it goes to show how your love for someone can change overnight. I am going to be where I should be right now, I had taken a wrong route, now I am taking a U-turn. There is no pain in going back to where God has stored for me, a place of destiny and dreams. God, in You, I truly surrender all over again. No more temptations can seized me. 1 Corinthians 10:13
I came earlier than her, but I lost! I did shared with you that, I have to fight in order to stand by you, and I guess I lost this fight, not to the girl, but against your emotions. I lost bitterly. Well, looking back at the journey, I know I tried my best. I made you feel loved at least for a moment. It may mean nothing but then again, I had given my best; I have no regret to walk out of this battle today. When I thought of giving up, you told me to hold on and I did. Yet for all that I received, I heard you saying you were selfish to enjoy the world of two (2 girls). I told myself, you aren't playing hard to get, and what I am experiencing is called, courting! I screwed hope into my thoughts, yet you have to tarnish it.
Sometimes, I do ask GOD, why do such things has to happen? Why so many guys who had entered my life shared the same reasons of why they think they would not like to be with me, because they think they would pull me down for their faith and trust in God is not as high as mine. God, my faith was given by You, yet why God, did you not send man who can't lead me in life? I was reminded, HE IS JUST NOT THE MAN. I ought to trust God for the BEST; someone pure and innocent; sweet and lovely; faithful and true. All right, trust God.
-Reflection-
I had given more than love, time and gifts and for a moment, I was taken back, what have you done? When we were out, it was me who paid for all - except the movie -, I am not concern with the money for I can bless but I guess I was already blind then. I had clearly forgotten you are a GUY/BOY, and if you do like someone, you will go that extra mile to pay and to spend time together with her. (We went out only 3 times) Well, no regrets, Daphne. Time that was spent, I trust God I have impacted your life with words and actions, gift that was given, was a sign of showing festive season of love and some motivations, money which was blessed, taught me a faithful lesson with God, for it is more blessed to give than to receive. Every bad things will turn out to be great in the hands of God.
Let me cry for one last time today and I promised, I will move on.
Before I end, my blessing goes out to you.
Shinning His Light
Daphne Chloe
9:29:00 AM
