I just completed 2 common test papers and I thank those who prayed alongside me through this period of my life. It is really a testimony of God’s grace and mercy on me. Like I mentioned in the past entry, I am pretty lousy in memorizing texts, not to mention I have to do so for half of my lecture notes. As you all knew, I am not someone who gives up even when I know I can’t do it but yet I strive and if I can’t make it, I know I tried my best. It was tough having so many distractions at home that will hinder me from studying, but I am reminded in the God’s word, NOTHING HAS SEIZED YOU EXCEPT WHAT IS COMMON TO MAN. I told myself I will be able to stand up against it. I really mug through my last semester studying really hard (smart). As I look upon those papers that I sat, the standard of difficulties were there, but I believe I tried myself doing what I can. All Glory belongs to God.
Now is time to stress over all the projects that will be due when school starts again. Though now is supposedly to be HOLIDAYS but I can’t believe the number of projects that I ought to complete. As I mentioned to many others, tough as it maybe, I kind of enjoy the feeling of studying now. I don’t wish to miss my Polytechnic years and regret not treasuring it; I decided to run this last lap the best of what I can and capable for!
I gave myself a little bit more time recently to just think of what I really want to do with things that I have left aside for a while. I really asked myself a lot of questions and since nobody thinks is their faults then I should admit is mine then. To the both of you, I am sorry for all that I have done against you, I am sorry for making you love me and yet I can’t commit to you in anyway. I am sorry for loving you at the end of the day and creating a whole load of problems for you. I am sorry that I have chosen to move on now. I just want to bless you with her through all the days of your life. I know it will be tough, but do forgive me, because I really want to see you be happy about moving on in life. I am not someone special enough for you, so do treasure her who is beside you now. My Dearest Ones, thank you for all those wonderful times that was given to me there, I promised it will be stored in my life forever. I always believe, even when we can’t be couples, we can always be friends. My numbers will never change because I am waiting for your call one of this day.
I feel so light because through forgiveness, the light for my path seems to be brightens up. I have a chat with someone I always looked up too. She is really encouraging. While talking to her, I realized how I have been blinded by the world. How I gave in to the Satan who works 24/7. Now I am going to make the difference by standing up and walking in Obedience to what God has for me. The heart is willing, the flesh is weak, should be change to the heart is obedient, the flesh will follow. Thank You God for giving me that space to be alone with You and to know what You have for me. I am going to tell the world of all Your wonders, to the children, Your faithfulness and love.
People I am staying put at where I am for now until I am sure of what God has for me. I will not want to waiver anymore and neither do I want to think and consider much longer. I know though I have lost the heart of being in where I am, I shall not forget my heart for the people and the calling why I was here. People who think they are right shall NEVER tear me apart, but they shall be put to shame by God because they never learn to humble themselves. Once again. I just want to give the best of what I have back to God.
A new year will be a new beginning. I remember a Pastor said before the 7th year is a good year. Some of us never realized the blessings in the beginning of the journey, but the Lord is good, He shows His grace and mercy throughout our lives too. 14th December 2007 is the 7th year since I accepted God. 14th December is also the date when I was baptized. This year 14th December shall mark as a day where I give my Lord all that I have for more of Him. A New Year with the Lord and from 14th December to the end of the year, I will be praying to see the Lord what He wants for me in this New Year. I am just excited to know the plans my God has me.
Be Blessed people,
Daphne Chloe
5:37:00 PM